Getting over an ex

I was looking at forums and this guy was talking about how it took him forever to get over his ex and that it still hurt to think about her. I've been like that before myself and I know plenty of other guys who are like that too. Because I know the feeling and had to teach myself how to get over it, I will give a few tips on how to get over your ex.

1. Time

Unfortunately, this is sometimes the only cure for getting over someone. Time will make it easier because you will forget how you two were as a couple. You'll forget the things that made you love them. You'll also see it isn't that bad being single. You might also realize that things were bad and they were right about the relationship needing to end. In time, you'll realize it wasn't meant to be. However, if you don't want to wait, here are some tips on how to speed up the process.

2. Hang out with friends

Being able to talk to your friends about it can relieve the pain but hanging out with them can also make you forget about the breakup. Have fun with your friends. Do things you couldn't do while in the relationship. I'm not saying do horrible things but do things you wanted to do and couldn't. Go out with your friends and talk to them about anything. The important thing here is to do things that will make you forget about them. Go to places you two didn't go. go places that don't remind you of them. Its easier to get through it with friends.

3. Make a list

Think of the things that you didn't like about your ex. Write it on a piece of paper. I'll be honest. This isn't my idea. I stole it from How I Met Your Mother but when I heard it, I thought that's a great idea and I did it since then. Thats why I'm including it here. If you ever find yourself missing your ex, look at this paper to remember why it is a good thing you two aren't together. You'll see that the thing you miss about them is nothing compared to the things you will never miss. It will help you stay strong and get over them.

4. Talk to other people

The easiest way to get over someone is by finding someone else. I'm not saying jump into another relationship right away. Start by just talking or casual flirting. It is easy to forget someone when you're thinking of someone else. If you have feelings for someone new, those feelings for your ex will go away faster. This new person might be a lot better than your ex and you'll wonder why you were ever with your ex. I'm not saying right after the breakup, date someone new but it doesn't hurt to look.

Those were a few tips on how to get over your ex. If you like the advice and want some more personalized advice, comment and ask a question below.

detailed tips #1

                In my last blog, I wrote some general tips on how to make a relationship work. In this blog and others to come, I will write detailed tips on how to make it work. Today's tip is to make a good impression on the people who are close to your partner like their friends and family. I say this because if their friends or family like you, you are in.
               If they like you, they will say good things about you to your partner which will make them them like you even more. On the other hand, if they don't like you, they will say negative things about you to your partner which will make them have doubts about you and your relationship. Also, those friends and family of hers are people you will have to hang out with and I don't know about you but I like to hang out with people who like me and enjoy my company.
               If they don't like you, these times will always be bad experiences that make your partner doubt the relationship even more. However, if those times are good times and they see you get along with the people that are close to them, they see someone they want to be with and they see a relationship that can last. When you get along with the people that are close to them, you become closer to them. If you don't get along with them, they will do more things that exclude you because they are afraid of another bad experience with you and the other people in their lives.
             This will cause the relationship to become distant. When a relationship become distant, it is close to the end. If you are someone their friends and family likes, your partner will want to include you in more things which strengthens your relationship and if your relationship gets better it will last longer. Long story short, if you want to make the relationship last, get along with their friends and family.

If you like this advice and want some personalized advice of your own, comment and ask a question below.

First Anonymous Question

This is what I just got as a comment on my last post:


Ok, so here is the deal, tell me what you honestly think I should do. I am putting your advice giving skills to the test. So throughout all high school I was obsessivly in love with a friend of mine, I went over and spent time with her, and been a friend, but I would always do something stupid like push myself on her more or whatever. I went to the point of where I actually wrote a letter to her admitting how I felt about her and everything at the time.
               Well after a while I decided that it would be the best for both me and her, if I just started dating other people and everything. Well now we are in college, we became pretty good friends, and now that I am single again for a while, those feelings have started coming back and I am scared and not sure what to do. I want to be her friend and her not to think bad of me because of this, but yet I know that my feelings will never change and so I don't know what I should do.

     This is the first true advice I'm giving on this blog and I will do my best so here it goes. You asked me to be honest so I will tell you that it looks like you got friend-zoned (at least in high school). What you can do now is one of two things. 1. Admit to yourself that it might be better to just stay friends especially if she wasn't sending back any feelings back in high school. or 2. You try to see how she acts towards you now. She might have forgotten that you pushed yourself on her back in high school. If she did, never bring it up again even as a joke. You might lose any chance at her. If she acts like she likes you now, go for it but ask her to go on a casual date not some big ordeal and definitely don't tell her you've been obsessively in love with her. if she says yes to the casual date, act normal. Subtlety is the key in this situation. You can't go over the top with your emotions on a first date.
             If the first date is good, ask her on another one and see where it goes. If she doesn't act like she likes you or she says no, just remain friends with her and stop trying with this one girl. Try to move on and look for someone else. If you are hung up on this girl, you won't be able to find anyone else so if you know there isn't any chance with her, you might as well forget any romantic things with her. If you move on and find someone else, those feelings will change about her and you'll see that it wasn't worth getting worked over. Long story short, see if she likes you by the way she acts. If she seems like she does, ask her out on a casual date. If not or if she says no, try to find someone else simple as that.

If you liked this answer or want some other kind of advice, write a comment below and ask anything.