I'm writing this because I see simple mistakes happen all the time in relationships. I'm not perfect in relationships myself and for the longest time I made many mistakes. However, over time through my experiences and through observation, I see why a relationship works and why they don't. For the longest time, getting the girl was easy and keeping her was hard for me. I now see it happen with friends of mine and I feel bad when they lose the girl because of a stupid mistake that could've been avoided. So for those friends and for anyone reading this blog, here is a list of a few tips to make the relationship last.
1. Be honest with each other
Honesty is the best policy is a correct saying in this case. If you are going to do something you're worried your partner will disapprove ask them or at least, let them know. Don't hide it from them or lie about it because when they find out and they will eventually find out, they will feel angry, hurt, and betrayed. One lie depending on how big it is could ruin the relationship because your partner could lose all the trust they have in you. I understand why people hide things from each other. They think if the partner doesn't know I'm doing this then it won't hurt us and the relationship will last longer. This is backwards thinking as when they do find out, you might lose them or you could've told them in the beginning and it would help build trust. For a relationship to work, there has to be trust and for there to be trust, you have to be honest.
2. Remember to put them above yourself
If you are with someone, you have to be willing to make sacrifices to make it work. There will be certain places you won't be able to go and things you won't be able to do. You have to decide they are worth it and if they truly are, it shouldn't be hard to give those things up. Remember that you chose your partner and chose to be in this relationship. If you love them, let them know not only with words but with actions and one of these actions is showing you are willing to give up things for them.You have to let them know they are more important than your old life. If they are, this one shouldn't be hard to do.
3. Treat them how they want to be treated
Forget the golden rule. Use the platinum rule in a relationship. Instead of treating them how you want to be treated, treat them how they want to be treated. They won't have all the same likes you have so your idea of fun isn't their idea of fun. You will have to do things you don't enjoy but you can persevere because remember you are with them and they are worth it. In return, they will or at least they should do the same for you and anything you like to do is usually better with them by your side. Also, certain things you're ok with aren't things they will be ok with so don't do those things. They will want to be treated a different way than you like to be treated. The general rule is if you don't know they like to be treated yet, treat them as best as you can.
4. Communication
This is a pretty simple thing to do but a lot of couples avoid it. If certain things are bothering you, speak up and let your partner know whats wrong. Don't pretend that everything is ok because then you will bottle it up and resent your partner for something they don't know bothers you. If something bothers you, let them know in a calm and civil way before you bottle it up and emotions take control. Most of the time people do something wrong, it is because they don't know what they're doing is wrong so let them know and most likely, they will stop doing that thing and it will be fixed. Also, talk about what you enjoy so they know what to do to make you happy. The main point here is to just talk to your partner and figure out ways to make it work.
Those are four of my tips for a good relationship. There is a lot of other little things but I was putting major things in this list. If you follow these simple rules, you will have longer lasting relationships. If you liked this post and want some personal advice, comment and ask a question about anything below.
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